Monday

Thank you, and good night

Medical Mystery Solved

The story, in part:

"A mysterious nerve disorder that hit some slaughterhouse employees with debilitating symptoms apparently was caused by inhaling a fine mist of pig brain tissue."

Does anyone need to read past the first sentence? Can anyone read past the first sentence?


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Which of the Seven Deadly Sins wristbands suits you best? I wish one of the sins were "Apathy." It would be so fourteen-years old Junoxious to wear. But, you know. Whatever.

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Not Martha makes Bacon Cups; who thought anyone could ever perfect the concept of the winning bacon mat? And where, pray tell, is the much-needed Bacon Bikini? When it's cooked, you know you have to get out of the sun - it's time to snack, and, hideo ho, your kicky outfit has shrunk by two-thirds. Plus, your skin is so moist, like a roasted suckling pig!

Oh, no, you don't. The Bacon Bikini is my idea. The Bakini. The Baconi.

Okay, I don't yet know what I'm calling it, but I am so gonna TM it.

For the more demure among us, might I suggest the tasteful Canadian Bacon one-piece?

8 comments:

Jennifer said...

I'm kind of bummed that "wristband" now means those rubberly bracelets. Wristbands should be somewhat fuzzy and protect your hands from forearm perspiration.

Magpie said...

OMG, the bacon bikini is genius. Not that I would wear one, I just like thinking about it.

Becca said...

mmmmm, bacon bacon bacon bacon BACON!!! You know, in Canada, Canadian bacon isn't called that (nor is it just bacon, for all the smart-asses who have said that to me over the years...) it's Back Bacon or Pea-meal Bacon. And I hate the crap.

Martha said...

I can not wear a bacon anything. It would not be kosher.

BarbaraCA said...

What about turkey bacon? What about tofubacon? We could do a cutlet halter top out of deli meats. Come on. You have to support my dream!

Lauri said...

Make the stuff with veggie bacon, and you've got yourself a customer!

Ericka said...

Oh, Barbara. It's sorta kinda been done (though not with bacon) --
http://www.heatherweathers.com/TP_SMreview.html

and here... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZQCDChiXrQ

Though I wouldn't wear it (my bikini days are over, bacon or no bacon) I might eat a crispy one off of Kate Winslett ... was that TMI? Don't let my husband know.

Martha said...

OMG. Ericka and I are Kate-loving-bacon-eating twins!!!!!